Greetings on this BEAUTIFUL day.... I really wish I was outside and NOT in this office! We have another slow day today but I am going to attempt to enjoy the slowness!
SO... as I wait for the first of our 2 patients for today... I felt like blogging about some personal struggles that I have been battling with for 9 months! (But I really have struggled with them my entire life)!
One of the many idols in my life is food... maybe you can relate. I enjoy food... probably too much! I love the accomplishment of cooking, I love the pleasure of tasting and eating, and I take MUCH comfort in food and I have often used it to cope with the stresses that life brings.
Last October, after finally getting a new job and being settled back in Fargo (from our summer in Minot), I decided it was time for a change in this ridiculous almost addictive relationship I had with food. I began counting my calories using a online site that helped you find out how many calories I was consuming daily and then helped me set goals of eating a healthier, balanced diet... without the binge eating! With the help of my husband in encouraging me to exercise, challenging me when I go for the ice cream, and praying for me, I have learned quite a few lessons....
Lesson #1: This is not just a physical battle.... this is a spiritual battle. A recent realization I had was that SELF-CONTROL REALLY IS A FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT! Jesus has given me the power to overcome these addictive behaviors. Max Lucado states it well in his book "When God Whispers Your Name"... " "I choose self-control... I am a spiritual being. After this body is dead, my spirit will soar. I refuse to let what will rot, rule the eternal. I choose self-control." (this is my new motto)
Lesson #2: Because I am imperfect... I will fail... but that does not mean that I quit! I have had many bad days (4th of July weekend for example.... WAY too many smores). It is sad that I did not allow the Holy Spirit to help control me... but I learn more about my weaknesses in those moments and I am up for another challenge when the next holiday comes.
Lesson #3: Exercise is actually fun and yes... I CAN RUN! For years, I told myself I hated running and running was just something I simply could not do. Well, surprise surprise, when I put my mind to it, running is not so scary. I started slow... jogging only a couple blocks at a time... and I'm not saying I'll be doing marathons anytime soon... but exercise does not scare me anymore and I have found going out for a jog a great way to meet with Jesus and talk with Him... thanking Him for the physical body He has given me and the beautiful creation... again... it is a neat spiritual experience!
Lesson #4: I'm not only obsessed with food.... I'm obsessed with my own vanity! I am now less excited and less motivated because I have come to a plateau in my journey. For a while, I was loosing weight and things were fitting looser and looser... I was gaining some serious confident and I was very pleased with how I looked. I'm not making that type of progress anymore and I have found myself down about it.... What I think Jesus is trying to teach me is that I have a vanity idol (another idol) and I need to focus on becoming more healthy... not just more thin!
I'm going to the gym tonight... :D My biggest prayer request is that I can continue these healthy habits all through my life, especially after big changes... (moving, children, death in the family etc.)
Hope this has encouraged some of you and maybe challenged others.... I will end with a few verses that sum it up pretty well....
1st Corinthians 10-11-13
11These things happened to them [Israelite] as examples and were written down as warnings for us, on whom the fulfillment of the ages has come. 12So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall! 13No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.
great blog post as always jocelyn! I think we all can relate on some level. I also have always told myself I cannot run, but that's after years of being forced to run in high school for sports. I have always thought that I should get back into it. Maybe I will?... I'll be praying for you and your wishes above as well!
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